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The Quick & The Dead 1990s Demo (1st Album) by Williams & O'Connor

Listen to our restored & remastered demo album!

The Quick and The Dead is an original demo album I made with my longtime music partner, Taylor O'Connor. The songs on this album were written in the late 80s to mid 90's. This year marks the 30 year anniversary of this original demo album! The album was enough to get us a small record deal at the time, although we never pursued that path. For more on the backstory check out my interview with Voyage Magazine.

Some tracks on 'It Ain't Hard, It Ain't Easy' were recorded on 4 track cassette, but all other songs were recorded on a digital ADAT recorder using SVHS tape. The set up at the time was simple and clean, and it allowed us to focus on the songwriting, which is just the way I like it. It was a creative, joyful time in my life and I am pleased to be able to remaster these original recordings and get them sounding their best. Extracting the source material from those legacy recording technologies was tedious and time consuming. The old recorders used tape and the tapes were sticky, crinkled, and damaged. The transport mechanisms with their rubber idler tires, pinch rollers, and belts had all turned to sticky tar! First, I had to disassemble these machines to clean all that gunk out of them and replace the rubber parts with what I could find available today. Even the play speeds differed between recording machines making some songs a touch off of standard key frequencies. Loose connections and damaged tapes added to the challenge, but eventually I was able to splice and repair the tapes and transfer the multi-tracks for all of the songs into a modern digital audio workstation (DAW).

From there I added new bass and drum tracks. I added background vocals and guitar tracks on some songs that needed them. Finally, I remixed and remastered each song to bring them where they are now. Almost all of the songs were recorded off-grid, with natural human timing. There remains a quirky, lo-fi quality to one or two songs, but I was glad to keep the original charm of these tracks true to their time. It was a labor of love, taking many months, and I hope you enjoy listening to these songs as much we as enjoyed creating them and renewing them!

Several other musicians collaborated on these songs. Although I have lost touch with many of them, Taylor and I want to acknowledge the important contributions they made to the album.

Steve Levine played the incredible harmonica solos on 'Admit Me' and Michael Carriare played electric guitar on that song. Thanks to our great friend George Varani for connecting us to Michael. Karin Allen sang the beautiful female harmony track on 'It Ain't Hard'. My wife, Heather, painted the original cover art we used for the album 30 years ago. Many thanks to them for adding their joy and talents to these songs. Special thanks to Rich Spangenberg for loaning me his ADAT 8-track recorder so I could transfer my old source recordings (and especially for letting me take it apart to get it working). This album could not have happened without his generosity.

Taylor O'Connor plays piano, mandolin, harmonica, and drums on the original tracks. I performed vocals and guitar on the original tracks, and bass, drums, guitar, and background vocals on the remastered versions. Most of the original songs did not have drums or bass, so adding these elements brought to life our original vision for them.

I've included original photos from the demo in the song descriptions below. Singles from the album will be released each month beginning November 2024, starting with 'Drinker 21'. The full album will be released in 2025.

Patrick Williams, November 2024

Song Descriptions, Lyrics, and Chords

Patrick Williams, 1994

Taylor O'Connor

Hope and Nicotine

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Hope and Nicotine

Hope and Nicotine expresses the imagery and emotion around grace and redemption. It was inspired by many long road trips home to see my parents, traveling through the Appalachian Mountains and being moved by their ancient grandeur. There was a lot of quiet time for contemplation on those journeys.

Last year I made a road trip to Michigan and found myself driving silently, playing nothing on the stereo, and instead enjoying the long stretches of peaceful silence. I'd missed having so much time to think, pray, and meditate. But once I was deep into the West Virginia mountains I suddenly wanted to hear Hope & Nicotine. That trip was a catalyst for me to restore these songs and bring them where they needed to be.

Expand For 'Hope & Nicotine' Lyrics & Chords

Hope & Nicotine Lyrics

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Coming off Tuesday

Wednesday’s gotta move me

She says the clouds

Are cut from mountains

She says the mountain's

Cut from rain

And she rains on me

Cooled by the forest dew

I heard a whisper call like snow

And I followed you

Driving till I’m homesick

Bent on hope and nicotine

She says I know a savior

She says my savior’s

All around me

Now she’s all around me

But I fall apart

When I think about falling apart

And it all comes down

To here and now

I close my eyes

And I am here now

Coming down from Calvary

Cryin’ for forgiveness

She says my home

Is waiting for me

She says my faith

Will take me there

It’ll take me there

Stilled by ancestors

Drawn to water

Down the hollow

Fight to swallow air

Breathe in the warrior’s soul

But I fall apart

When I think about falling apart

And it all comes down

To here and now

I close my eyes

And I am here now

She says I never knew my soul

She says I never thought about it

She says I know a savior

She says my savior’s all around me

All around

Feel my freedom open heaven

I tell you

That my freedom’s catching

She says the clouds

Are cut from mountains

She says I know a savior

I know a savior

Patrick in a jam, 1991

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Drinker 21

Drinker 21 is a rumination about heartbreak in 3/4 time. I wrote this song in 1992 when I was working as a bartender in a college town. This was a job I disliked very much. At the time I had just graduated and was looking for an engineering job, working at a bar at night to pay the rent while making lots of music during the day. This song reflects my inner discord as it shifts between the patron's grief, and the bartender's self possession (just another number). It is a diary of that time, seeing myself in both characters at once, and reflecting on loss and longing. The song was a way to express this dichotomy and tension within.

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Drinker 21 Lyrics

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The bartender looked through

The eye in the mirror and then,

Poured me a drink.

"How about them Orioles,

Going for the pennant this year?"

He smiled as he said it, as if

Maybe that made him happy.

But I know that’s not very happy,

If you’re the guy

Rooting for Boston

And I know she left me

To save me the pain

Of knowing she would.

Oh, oh

Drinker 21

Another rounds coming and then

You can tell me your struggle

Drinker 21

You’re not the only one

I just dumped two today

The bartender moved close

To give me a light

For the smoke,

That filled my intentions.

She could’ve loved me

If I hadn’t given so much

But I know she loved me

cause I have

all of the pain to prove it

And I know she left me

To save me the pain

Of knowing she would.

Oh, oh

Drinker 21

Another rounds coming and then

You can tell me your struggle

Drinker 21

You’re not the only one

I just dumped two today.

Drinker 21

Another rounds coming and then

You can tell me your struggle

Drinker 21

You’re not the only one

We both will be lucky to die

Three sets of hiking boots at a mountain overlook

Backpacking with friends, 1991

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It Ain't Hard,

It Ain't Easy

It Ain't Hard, It Ain't Easy is one of the first songs I ever wrote. The initial tracks were recorded on a 4 track tape machine in the late 1980's and it bears that sound quality. It's a simple song I still love playing today. The 3 part harmonies, the piano, the harmonica...the crickets! All conjure fond memories of the time it was recorded and the simple joy of making music. Special thanks to Karin Allen for her beautiful harmonies.

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It Ain't Hard Lyrics

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Ooh, it ain't hard,

It ain't easy loving you.

If he told you

That his love was real

He fooled you.

And if you fell for his love

Did you let it rule you?

Ooh, it ain't hard,

It ain't easy loving you.

Are you searching for

Your love's lost lies

And dreaming?

Come and walk with me

And love will never leave you

Ooh, it ain't hard,

It ain't easy loving you

Ooh, it ain't hard,

It ain't easy leaving you

Ooh, it ain't hard,

It ain't easy loving you

Ooh, it ain't hard,

It ain't easy leaving you

Taylor with the keys, 1990

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Taylor Road

Taylor Road is a country road in Ohio that I used to bike with my girlfriend (now my wife). It was inspired on one of our rides together and visualizes the joy of my heart and the desire to heal through acts of love.

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Taylor Road Lyrics

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Down on Taylor Road

Past where I told you

All my heart

Would ever know.

Coyotes roam the land

Close to the loss I feel

My love don't heal no one

All I want is your peace

To sooth me.

It's all I need,

If you want to move me

Catch me lost in you

Almost took it

For my own

Filled by the moon

Wrapped around

My eyes and toes

That lifts all life to grow

Held by your soul

That’s told by

The loss I feel

My love don't heal no one

All I want is your peace

To sooth me.

It’s all I need,

If you want to move me

Catch me lost in you

Almost took it

For my own.

Stretched out

Like a country mile

Drawn towards

The setting sun

Past where I told you

All I want is your peace

To sooth me.

It’s all I need,

If you want to move me

Catch me lost in you

Almost took it

For my own.

Down on Taylor Road

Past where I told you

All my heart

Would ever know

Play

Servant To King

Servant To King started as a guitar song and ended up a piano song. The piano playing by Taylor is glorious, so I am glad for the evolution of this song. It's fun to play on guitar, but I am inspired by the originality and power of what Taylor played. The strong, rolling piano riffs that land and immediately restart their run beautifully capture the 3/4 beat and drive the song forward. I think of this song as the peak of our collaborative energies. I remember Taylor and I reading each another's mind on where a song should go during this time. It is a memory I cherish. I'm grateful to have experienced that deep music connection and the power of collaboration.

The song is a contemporary spiritual song about faith and providence.

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Servant To King Lyrics

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I need the river, to wet my lips

I need the sun, to dry my lips

So I can thirst again

Embrace me dear Jesus,

My arms are around the world

My heart is at home

With the Son.

I need the salt

To heal my wounds

I need the earth

To touch my bones

So I can live again

Embrace me dear Jesus,

My arms are around the world

My heart is at home

With the Son

Embrace me dear Jesus,

My arms are around the world

My heart is at home

With the son

When peace conquers violence

And guns become silent

The servant will live with the King

When peace conquers violence

And guns become silent

The servant will live with the King

When peace conquers violence

And guns become silent

The servant will live with the King

Embrace me dear Jesus,

My arms are around the world

My heart is at home

With the Son

Embrace me dear Jesus,

My arms are around the world

Taylor atop Old Rag Mountain, Shenandoah NP

Play

Find My Way

Find My Way was an improvised piano piece Taylor had recorded with a DAT machine and a Steinway grand piano at the University of Maryland. He didn't have a mic preamp so he cranked up what little gain the DAT player had to offer and just started playing, creating a beautiful, heartfelt ballad. You can hear the slight hiss of the cranked up gain knob at the start of the song. This was a time when digital recording was just beginning and this song marks our first step towards a higher quality sound. At the time he wrote the piano piece I had just moved from Maryland to Ohio. When I heard it I couldn't wait to develop it further and immediately started writing the vocal melody and lyrics. This song inspired us to make this album together and it may never have happened without it. I am grateful for how music can bind us together.

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Find My Way Lyrics

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Maybe I’ll find my way

To the mountain

Or maybe I’d like to try

Or maybe I’ll breathe you in

And understand where I begin

Maybe my eyes are dry from pain

And maybe my soul

Is home again

Or maybe my fight’s all gone

‘Cause I don’t have to fight alone

Letting go only means

Giving up the bad fight

That keeps your soul from peace

Now you see you are OK

Maybe I’ll find my way

To the mountain

Maybe I’d like to try

Maybe I’ll breathe you in

And understand where I begin

Letting go only means

Giving up the bad fight

That keeps your soul from peace

Let go. Now you see you are OK

Now I see love in us

Maybe I’ll find my way

To the mountain

Or maybe I’d like to try

Or maybe I’ll breathe you in

And understand where I begin

Maybe, maybe, maybe

ohh

Maybe my eyes are dry from pain

And maybe my

Soul is home again

Or maybe

My fight’s all gone

‘Cause I don’t have to fight alone

Play

Legacy

Legacy was inspired after driving along a 12 lane city beltway and imagining what the landscape looked like 3 thousand years earlier, when hunters roamed the land and life was simpler and much less convenient. The sprawl around me made me ponder how we've lost touch with our roots. It is a tribute to a humanity long dead, whose simple joys of living inspire me to reconnect across the many barriers we erect with each other, and with God.

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Legacy Lyrics

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This day is mine for free

My little car lost in a sea

Over these hills

Great hunters did roam

And I order over the phone

Oh ah ah

No moment’s more precious

Than now

And I’ve been in line for hours

Ah, ah

Oh ah ah

Our kind were survivors

In the past

The memory just won’t last

This day is mine for free

My little car lost in a sea

Oh ah ah

Play

Drown

Drown is a deeply personal song. It's an exploration of despair and the relentless nature it can possess inside of us when we abandon hope, which we must never do. This song serves as my substitute for despair and that is the reason it exists. When Taylor shared the piano composition with me, the music sparked such a depth of emotion in me that I couldn't wait to collaborate on it. This remastered version adds drums, bass, and synthesizer tracks which I believe add richness to the song.

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Drown Lyrics

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Claw at the flow of water

Helpless as this moment

Slip to cold, the life above

Cast out like the pull,

go under

Drown, down deep the sorrow

Float beyond tomorrow

Rise, and fill the body full

Drown down very deep

Lost, is this that once was all

Gone, as the frost turns to fall

Drown, down deep the sorrow

Float beyond tomorrow

Rise, and gasp the body full

Drown down very deep

Wash upon a rolling wave

Gone is all that ever saves

Fall to wills that never gave

Wash upon a rolling wave

Gone is all that ever saves

Fall to wills that never gave

Life, still pours to this ingestion

Crumble to the tides

That question

Who am I?

Drown, down deep the sorrow

Float beyond tomorrow

Rise, and gasp the body full

Drown down very deep

Taylor and Patrick looking fancy in the mid 1980s

Taylor and Patrick photo shoot for an earlier album version in the 1980's

Play Push

Push was written in a period before internet when my friends and I would mail cassette tapes to each other with the challenge to write 1 new song every week! We would dutifully write our songs, add some commentary, and mail our tape each month. This song was on one of those tapes, and Taylor and I decided to develop it further. I am inspired by Taylor's piano track, especially mid song during the lyric "once when I was a boy, I was amused when I twirled around. But now, but not now, I spin around among my fear...". The fast driving piano riff is so inspiring to me I find myself rewinding it to hear it over and over again!

Expand for 'Push' Lyrics & Chords

Now I don't let in

Who I don't let in

But if you come real close

I'll skip the handshake

Feel your heart take me

Then the storms came

And the floods came

And all that came

Did pass his judgement on me

Feel the anger of God

Homing in on me

Feel the push of love

Closing in on me

Feel the anger of God

Homing in on me

Feel the push of love

Closing in on me

Once, when I was a boy

I was amused

When I twirled around

But now, but not now

I spin around among my fear

And if I could find the ground

And if I could find the ground!

Feel the anger of God

Homing in on me

Feel the push of love

Closing in on me

Feel the anger of God

Homing in on me

Feel the push of love

Closing in on me

I fall down

I am embraceable

I call out

I am embraceable

Feel the anger of God

Homing in on me

Feel the push of love

Closing in on me

Feel the anger of God

Homing in on me

Feel the push of love

Closing in on me

Original demo tapes sold in local stores and mailed to record companies, 1993-94

Admit Me (Unreleased) is another song inspired by my observations as a bartender. It's a story of longing, confession, and redemption, exploring our human condition from a place of pain to a place of hope. The source tape for this song was on 4 track cassette, so the fidelity is not great, but the performance is inspired. Special thanks for the incredible musicianship of Steve Levine on harmonica, and Michael Carriare on electric guitar.

This song is an unreleased outtake. Use the audio player below, or Click here to listen.

Original cassette album cover and song order

I'm Alive (Unreleased) is a lo-fi recording that was extracted from a live radio interview Taylor and I did in Ohio. It was added to the original album to demonstrate our ability to perform live. Unfortunately, the source tape was low quality so Taylor and I plan to remake this song in the studio and release it on another album. I have some old recordings with new elements for this song that I look forward to bringing to life. The song itself is about embracing the pains and joys of life in equal measure.

This song is an unreleased outtake. Use the audio player below, or Click here to listen.

Expand For 'I'm Alive' Lyrics & Chords

I'm Alive Lyrics

Click Here For Chords

Coffee, smokes, and rent

And all my money's spent

40 hours down

And I am up again

Daybreak closing in;

Darkness falls; life begins

Tripping on the sea

That once was drowning me

Days of emptiness

Touch days of happiness

Far from there I come to here,

To laugh among the laughter

Days of emptiness

Touch days of happiness

Far from there I come to here,

To laugh among the laughter

Cable sharks and gold

And preacher save my soul

Can you feel my pain

Through the remote control?

My will is bound; twisted 'round

I keep it down

Like the crashing sea

That once was drowning me

Days of emptiness

Touch days of happiness

Far from there I come to here,

To laugh among the laughter

Days of emptiness

Touch days of happiness

Far from there I come to here,

To laugh among the laughter